Lately (02/30)

Whenever I’m talking about myself

I always start with ‘Lately, I’ve-‘,

and lately, I’ve been thinking that

if I keep saying lately about the same things

maybe they’re not so ‘lately’ after all?

Maybe these are the way things are.

Maybe that’s okay?

 

In fact, I reckon it is okay,

change doesn’t have to mean bad.

That’s just the answer my mental math

has been coming up with.

I need to go back over my workings,

be more patient,

use a calculator to check things over.

 

I might not always like the outcome:

things may in fact be as bad as I thought.

The answer might be

I am struggling more than I used to but

life gives you a series of challenges,

you give the responses:

 

‘today has been a bad day,

lately I’ve been stressed. And tired.

It’s probably a one off though’.

or

‘yes, today has been a bad day,

yesterday didn’t feel much better,

I’ve been stressed and tired lately.

I need to sort this out’.

 

I’m not saying that it’s fool proof,

I’m not saying it will always work.

If it works once,

if it teaches me to give myself a break every so often,

it might well be worth it.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about the way

I keep saying ‘lately I’ve-‘

and lately I’ve been working out what that means,

I think I found an answer.

 

Lately, I’ve been accepting things

the way they are and working through them,

but I haven’t stopped saying ‘lately’ lately.

 

-A.Webb (first draft)

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